Do you create or allow your life to happen? control is not the issue, attachment is what causes suffering. So be happy with your effort and understand that the result will be what it will be, though usually correlated with our effort. Allowing: being sick is like meditating. you arrange and maintain your circumstances (rest and fluids) and trust your body to heal. For meditation you maintain yourself calm and focused and trust your mind to awaken and be present with jhana. be steady and trust. Controlling: choose your circle of awareness with your attention. consciousness is like being asleep, alert, dreamy, agitated, worried, afraid, happy, loving, content and is affected by your attitude and degree of alertness. Energy maybe controlled with coffee, and you need enough to maintain effort, but too much doesn’t help. Practice is effort overcoming obstacles, not just being free of them.